Better Man

The main problem I see with being the better man, the bigger person, making "the right choice", doing the right thing, holding your tongue, "not going there"....

Is, most of the time, you're the only one who knows you did it.

SO......

So I've been working 12 plus hour days for basically the last month AND have been working for the last 10 days straight. So needless to say I am completely exhausted.

It's 11:00 pm and our main character steps into a run down dive bar and zzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzz....................................

Here's a little ditty....

So let me tell you a story about a man.... I'll call him "Tad", now Tad has a job that he has done for about 10 years, he doesn't really love this job nor does he really hate this job... he just does this job. Manly because it's kinda a cool job to have. But Tad is starting to realize that if you going to have a job that requires 12-14 hour days, sometimes 6 days a week, you should probably really love this job. I mean you got no time to do anything else right?

But what does a man do, who doesn't know anything else? Now Tad isn't too old or too young... in fact he hasn't even reached his prime yet. Hmmmmm.....

Maybe Tad should set a date, a goal and actually stick to it, after all he really never has. Maybe this goal will be in August....

Tad has never done anything for himself, because he is too nice, to always thinking about everyone else..... Maybe Tad should think about what would really make him happy....

And Tad really needs to get laid... ummm..... He told me.

HA

Three guys are having lunch on Venice boardwalk, when an extremely hot woman in a bikini walks by...
Man 1: " Man if I was a hot chick, I would never leave the house, just sit around and play with my tits all day!"
Man 2: " Yeah! I would just lay on the bed fingering myself for hours!"
Man 3: " Yeah, I know what you mean, if I was a hot chick, I could fuck any guy I wanted to!"

WTF.....

OK, the latest chapter: This same woman who I've been "dating" for about a month, who I finally maybe realized there just was just nothing there confused me again!!!! And of course I had just pretty much written it off to a life/love lesson, and you know not make the same mistake twice.

As yo may or may not know, we mostly text message each other, mostly because we both work crazy long hours and just can't hold a lengthy conversation. So she texted me this morning, saying basically I hope your day goes better then your yesterday, I replied yes, and that was pretty much it. So skip forward to about 5, I have a free moment and just text her a simply smiley face to brighten her day, she replies back the same. All cool, no confusion.... yet

So around 7ish she texts me "slaving sexy?", and that puts a smile on my face, I reply with a C level joke about wearing a slave loin cloth, she replies for "pics please!", I reply I'll see what I can do. And I text her a "kiss' icon, she replies with a smiley face and a kiss icon. YAY, right? So I get to the gym and text her, are you gonna be home/awake in like 45 minutes, because she was still at work. She replies she doesn't know yet. OK no worries, mate. That was at 10pm, she finally texts me back at 1130pm this "bed bye baby". WTF?????

I'm getting a little frustrated but it's still a "fun" one.....

Nothingness or retardedness.....

So I've been "kinda" dating this woman for about a month or so. And I'm beginning to think that there's nothing there. And that freaks me out, I mean in 38 years of life, and 20 or so of dating, I have never been in this situation... it's weird. I mean in the past it was always something.... common interests.... common background... great fuck. But now it's like her and I are both trying so hard to make something there, a spark. Which until today, never really thought of, or even thought it mattered.

And I'm not really sure if that's it, or I'm just out of practice or maybe my last relationship fucked me up more than I realized....

And this really does blow my mind, because she's very attractive and a very interesting person... but she likes to be chased, for the man to do all the stuff, which I'm cool with, but you know honestly... I like being chased too. If you want to grab my hand, kiss me, want me to come over and hold you... tell me. Don't be too coy. Just say it. I mean I have to admit, I am a big dumb animal sometimes... but come on.

Of course it could be that I just missed the "boyfriend" window and it's now shut... but all I can say about that is see big dumb animal line from earlier.

And I also feel sometimes that we're that we're just too different, I mean she an ADULT, got a great job that she loves, a great apartment, and she's looking for someone to compliment that, while I have a job, that's well just a job, a nice apartment full of crappy furniture....

So either there's nothing there... or I'm just retarded.... guess that would depend on which one of my friends you ask.